February 2010
31 posts
I put on my robe and wizard hat…
bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 Cock of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
January 2010
42 posts
Excellent Conversation.
(A friend sent me this, I think it's awesome. Keep in mind, I have virtually no clue what this was about, so there's nothing to get, just enjoy.)
T: U fucking cock blocked me so fucking bad. I was on the fucking fone with abby then u sent her that message telling her u liked her then all she was fucking doing was talking about u the whole goddamn time. I have never been this pissed off about a girl in mylife.
D: I didn’t mean to?
T: U know what the best part is u don’t even give a shit how pissed I am
D: I didn’t do anything?
T: didn’t have to fuckin tell her you liked her.
D: Yeah, I said did. Did. Not do. Did.
T: It doesn’t matter you said it, and we were having a good conversation, then u sent that messagve. And all she fuckin did was talk about you
D: She asked me bro. I answered. Not my fault.
T: Oh the worst part is telling her u like her more than me, cuz you how much I fucking like her. You have no clue
D: I didn’t say that. I said, jokingly, “It depends… he is my nukka”
T: Oh yeah and then teller her u get jealous of me being with her, that fuckin pizsed me off cuz u me fucking feel guilty as hell
D: I didn’t say I was jealous
T: Bull crap she told me u fuckin said that
D: Get on AIM, I have the conversation.
T: No
D: Whatever, I don’t care if you believe me, I have proof.
T: Whatever, im pissed of so bad right now.
D: Okay.
T: Asshole.
D: it’s not my fault.
T: Yes it fucking is!
D: How?
T: Becuase u ass hole
D: What? Hah.
T: Don’t fucking laugh
D: How is it my fault?
T: Cuz it just fucking is!
D: That doesn’t make any sense.
T: it doesn’t fucking have to
D: Yes. It actually does.
T: Fuck yo
D: That’s not nice.
T: Do byou think I fucking care?!
D: you should.
T: Shut the fuck up.
D: I’m texting you. I’m not making any noise. Maybe you should put your phone on silent.
T: Fuck you
D: Maybe later.
T: Ur so fucking gay
D: K.
T: Bitch
D: Ooh nooooo. You said bitch.
T: U really piss me off u fag
D: Okay. Go to sleep.
T: Don’t tell me what to fucking do
D: People call me craaaaaaaaaaaaazaaaaaaay.
T: Fuck you. Ur gay as fuck
D: How gay IS fuck?
T: Just fuck you and stop fucking talking to me
D: You’re texting me.
T: Whatever fucking faggot.
D: Hahahaha, okay.
T: Why the fuck is this funny?
D: Because you have no just reason to be mad at me, and you’re calling me names. I think it’s funny.
T: Its not fucking funny, do you have any idea how pissed I am at you?!
D: Obviously. I know.
T: Haha no u fucking don’t, ive never been this pissed in my fucking life
D: I see that.
T: Whatever fuck you. I am ending this conversation on this note, goodnight and have a fucking great night. Bitch
D: Hahahahahhahahha. Good night, sir.
JD Salinger
This man left us Wednesday. Postmodern literature has lost a lot, and I feel like there’s an empty place in the world of writing now.
Brb, gonna go cry and read “A Perfect Day for Bananafish”
(I’m not going to cry, that would be phony. But this really sucks.)
At least we still have Pynchon for a few more years.
Anonymous asked: 'sup dawg?
Anonymous asked: Favorite web-comic? (if any)
rickyv:
I wonder if we call it a BLT because we’d feel bad asking for a “bacon sandwich.”
I would personally be very proud.
Anonymous asked: What's your mother like?
Anonymous asked: Headphones or earphones?
My In-depth thoughts on the upcoming A-Team movie
Dude, it’s the fucking A-Team.
Sin and Punishment 2 →
Ahem.
…
YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Tetris for people who are too good at Tetris →
Tetris from a first person perspective is like hard drugs opposed to masturbating. They’re both fun and addictive, but one of them is like getting a steamroller to the face while eight rabid wolverines attack your genitals. Then again, I guess which one feels like the latter depends on how you masturbate.
Anyway, play Tetris, don’t do drugs, and masturbate safely.
“What, are our banks made of balsa wood and baby tears?”
– Jon Stewart on fragile economics.
“Well, it’s actually for eight year olds.”
– Jon Stewart on the rating of The Daily Show
Anonymous asked: Favorite movie?
Death Metal Rooster
ALL GLORY TO THE DEATH METAL ROOSTER.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A43JOxLa5MM&feature=youtube_gdata
That would make one hardcore twelve piece bucket.
Metroid: Other M
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrodfchKEgM
All these good games coming out, it’s sort of surreal. I swear, I don’t know if I can handle this much win at once.
I may need to see a doctor.
Let me show you them
My Pokemanz. They are coming. April 10th. Mark your calendars, prepare to fast, sacrifice a dove. Do something.
Hey, maybe just watch the trailer.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZXX0Th8EwA&sns=em
Dear god, Megaman 10, Super Mario Galaxy 2, Pokemanz finally comes to the states. The video game gods are smiling upon us. It’s gonna be a good 2010 friends. Yes, locked in my room with the...
Super Mario Galaxy 2? Moar liek Super Mario I...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iO10_IbDUBU&sns=em
Another video game trailer? Hot dog!
I swear, that greasy little Italian is a better space traveler than Armstrong and David Bowie ever were. And he does that on a dinosaur. (YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAH)
Now if they would just get off their asses and start talking release dates, I could start staring at my calendar in anticipation.
4 tags
MEGAMAN 10
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjAvXwnUUpA&sns=em
The year is 20XX and I just came. Everywhere. Holy shit, Megaman 10. Dear god. Is it legal to marry a company? If so, I’m on my knee proposing to Capcom right now. Listen to the music in that trailer. Yeah, the eargasm was unbelievable. That would be reason enough to buy the game, but OH MY GOD YOU CAN PLAY IT TOO!
supercactus asked: Are you me?
The people want to know!
In case you ever wanted to ask me a question, about anything, from romance languages to what my favorite literary horror monster is, (I like French and Cthulhu by the way) you can now do so at supercactus.tumblr.com/ask
Knock yourself and have fun, because I’ll have no idea who you are when you ask.
3 tags
The weather, but more in your face than the... →
How’s the fucking weather where you are? Here, it’s fucking cold out.
3 tags
JoCo Week: Day One
Okay, so, in order to prepare for the Jonathan Coulton concert I will be attending on Friday, I’ll be documenting the various things I do leading up to this momentous occasion right here on the internet!
So what did I do in preperation today? Well, first I meditated on the romantic life of a cyborg monkey zombie, all while hanging upside-down. The upside-down’s significance has been...
2 tags
“Our songs remind you of songs you’ve never heard.”
– John Linnell
4 tags
6 tags
If your cheese has gone black, you are in cheese...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8asnz3E4n4o&sns=em
Ashens is a British fellow who reviews cheap garbage items from those crummy Tiger Electronics games that your parents got you because they didn’t love you they didn’t have the time, to bizarre and useless items you’ll find in dollar stores. (Or Poundland, as it would be ‘cross the puddle. Right-O!) In any case, you should watch him, because...
6 tags
1 tag
“And you grew and you grew, and then you were you, you look like your father and...”
– “That Spells DNA” - Jonathan Coulton
2 tags
“Yes, I suppose if you don’t have a microphone like I do, you have no other...”
– John “Flansy” Flansburgh in concert